Here's the playlist from last night's show : 
Enter Shikari - Destabilise
White Lies - Bigger Than Us

Van Morrison - Brown Eyed Girl
Paolo Nutini - Coming Up Easy

Courteeners - Scratch Your Name Upon My Lips (Falcon)

Slade - My Oh My (The Amazing Kamikaze Syndrome)

Amy Winehouse & Mark Ronson - Valerie (Version)
Bee Gees - Lonely Days (Two Years On)

The Fab Four Freakout : 

John Lennon - (Just Like) Starting Over (Double Fantasy Stripped Down)
Beatles - Slow Down
Beatles - She's Leaving Home (Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band)
Beatles - Flying (Magical Mystery Tour)

Adele - Rolling In the Deep
Alesha Dixon - Radio

Brett Domino - Gillian McKeith

Coldplay - Christmas Lights

...and this week's UK top 5 : 

5). Far East Movement - Like a G6 (new)
4). Olly Murs - Thinking Of Me (non-mover)
3). Nicole Scherzinger - Poison (new)
2). Ellie Goulding - Your Song (non-mover)
1). X Factor Finalists 2010 - Heroes (non-mover)


It was a surprisingly average week in the British top 5, with a plethora of songs staying in place, and a couple of new entries. Why surprising? Because it's December, and usually there are so many songs vying for the top echelons of the chart that there's a bit more turnover. But we take what we can get, right? 

Every song tells a story, more or less. This week, we highlight the stories behind the songs :

 At number 5, we've got the All-Asian Angeleno Electro Hip-Hop group Far East Movement (there's actually supposed to be a * between Far and East, but I can't be bothered). 

Story : People drink. A lot. They get high (and fly). They dance.

The interesting thing about this track, which has already reached the number one position in America, is that this is the sort of thing that's been popular in Europe for, oh, six years or so now. All of this makes me think that Basshunter and Fat Man Scoop should probably re-release their entire catalogs in the USA, just to see what will inevitably climb the charts. 

"Like a G6" is simple, with an oscillating synth line, handclaps, and filtered vocals. Just to dispel any uncertainty, the song's "G6" refers to a model of Gulfstream private jet. And also, there's no uncertainty that there's not even a modicum of originality in either the instrumentation, the lyrics ("popping bottles". Again?!), or anything else. That said, the song has a certain alcoholic warmth to it that's charming. On the England Swings scale of 1-10, I give it a 6. 

Olly Murs hangs onto the number 4 slot for another week with "Thinking Of Me". 

Story : Guy used to be togevva with gal, they've moved on, but he still likes her and throws a bunch of nostalgic memories of their time at her in hopes that she'll hook up with him again. 

Olly continues his assault as the British "easy-goin' fella" with ska-lite tunes and "oh-oh" vocals. This ain't bad, but it's fairly forgettable. What was I talking about?

Oh. Yeah. I give Olly a 6.5.

Nicole Scherzinger has her first chart smash as a solo act, coming in at number 3 this week with "Poison".

 Story : I really have no idea what she's talking about. Sorry.It's got something to do with her using "Poison" to seduce somebody. I think.

The track is all ADHD, a bit like Cheryl Cole's "Promise This". It doesn't stand still long enough to get a real fix on it - it's overproduced to the max, and only vaguely catchy. Note that the track was released in the USA more than a month ago, and went absolutely nowhere : there's a reason for that. I might be proved wrong, but I'm guessing the British audience will tire of it quickly as well. I give it a 5.

Ellie Goulding manages to stay at number two a second week with "Your Song". 

Story : Gal likes guy, (or in the original version, perhaps it was guy likes guy), and can't afford to buy her great stuff, so s/he writes a song for her. 

Uncharacteristic of Ellie's past material, the song is simple - there's only a piano for most of it, and then strings creep in. Ellie's voice is not filtered, and is a bit idiosyncratic; therefore the song has a bit of rough-edged charm. It's all very nice, and fairly unimpressive. I'm going with a 6.5 on this one, too. 

The X Factor Finalists stay at the top of the chart with "Heroes". 

Story : Well, it was originally a song about being a "hero" by being mean and drinking all the time, but Simon Cowell has cut out the song's heart, and turned it into a vaguely inspiring charity single ABOUT heroes. 

Good guitar, though. No Carlos Alomar, but not bad. 

Of course, like every Syco records "ballad", it starts all slow and respectful, and then builds and BUILDS until it's a faux-gospel shout-out. 

It's mostly pretty awful, charity or no. 

I give it a 3.Album reviews coming soon!

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